In April 1986, the second single of the group X, called "Orgasm" went on sale. Yoshiki himself phoned shops selling indie records, and arranged for the supply of discs. He received orders from became interested points of sale for about 10 discs at cost 1,000 yen. By that time, Yoshiki had moved from a friend's apartment in Mejiro and rented an apartment, which cost much cheaper than housing in Ekoda. He brought all 2500 copies home, and sorted and packed them in boxes himself. The room was filled so that there was no place to sleep, but Yoshiki could not entrust such important work of preparing the discs for sale to no one.
Impulsive, always going his own way, Yoshiki nonetheless carefully thought over the strategy for X as a band. This became apparent in many areas, and one of the examples was the advertising campaign.
"If you put ads in music magazines, it will produce a great effect" - Yoshiki had been saying each time picking up the magazine. And just as he would call directly to the factory and publishing house, he turned to the editorial office to learn the conditions of advertising. He explained that the ads could be placed through an advertising agency or directly through the publisher of the magazine. After that he learned about the prices. It turned out that the cost of advertising depended on the circulation of the magazine and on what page it would be placed.
Yoshiki was able to find several hundred thousand yen, and placed advertisements of the single in magazines. It found a broad response everywhere. This had never happened with indie group before; releasing the single, it gave advertisements in magazines. Not the fans of the group, but managers of live-houses could not hide their amazement.
After that, Yoshiki found another, and seemed unthinkable, way to raise the popularity of the group. It was a performance in the popular comic television program.
Advertising in the press and performance on television changed the audience of the band. Many people, learning about Yoshiki from TV, then came to the concerts, and the number of spectators in live houses increased several times. Typically, the reaction of people who did not attend live houses was different. But at the concerts of X from the very beginning a noisy atmosphere was formed. Young people, who filled the hall to overflowing, jumped, almost bursting from the overwhelming energy. Looking at Yoshiki, banging on drums with furious force, like an athlete, with all body perceiving in music of X, they completely submerged in rhythm.
Before the eyes of admiring fans, Yoshiki, whose lithe body concealed physical strength and at the same time seduction, appeared as the image of an angel, which was depicted in churches.
However, Yoshiki, who went ahead, relying only on his own strength, had to meet counteraction as well. The growing popularity had a downside; X began to be ostracized in the world of live-houses, and was stuck with a label of a group that cares only about its external image.
However, Yoshiki did not lose confidence in his abilities.
"If you continue to run, then, sooner or later you will see the target. I don't have ways to retreat, now. "
And Yoshiki felt that the group of X, gaining acceleration with a deafening roar, moved forward.
With the money raised from the concerts, Yoshiki bought a cheap used van and having decided to arrange a tour to mark the release of the single, started preparations. Large-scale tour, which was to take place on areas of Tokyo, Nagoya and Osaka, became a new challenge for the band. And in the case of successful completion of the tour the sphere of group's activity would be increased dramatically.
But by the time the tour through the largest cities began, disagreements started among the group members. Jun and Hikaru, whom Yoshiki believed finally found permanent members of the group, began to contradict him.The cleavage had become more sharply defined, and eventually it became impossible to fix anything. They were throwing caustic remarks against Yoshiki:
Music of Yoshiki completely ceased to be a hard rock. We want to play real hard rock. "
"We do not want to play in the group, which is involved in TV programs and gets too many influences from everywhere."
During the tour right on the stage they announced about their separation from X and creation of a new band.
"Now we want to create a completely different group. This will be a group, performing classic hard rock; because it is no longer possible there. "
Yoshiki, who was deeply wounded by these harsh words, could do nothing, except watching their backs.
Of course, to play in a group or to leave it - was a private matter. But how could you announce it right at the concert, and with laugh!
Yoshiki did not speak with Hikaru and June again. Gathering all his strength, he completed a scheduled tour. Hikaru and June soon left the group.
Although the first edition of a single in 2500 copies was sold out, Yoshiki did not do a second overprinting since participated in the recording June and Hikaru had left the group.
Yoshiki, who was not parted with members of the group for the first time, thought that even now he should not be upset. Again, along with Toshimitsu, it was needed to search for new people. And suddenly he rushed into despair. Maybe he had never been able to find such participants, which he wanted.
In confusion he listened to what was happening around them.
Managers of live-houses and attended concerts music critics never ceased to scoff:
"To act in a humorous TV show is like to cause rock band a mortal wound. Now they can't even be called a rock band. X must stop their performances. In general, it is best to disband the group. "
Each time, hearing these words, Yoshiki boiled:
"What a nonsense - reduce all rock music to the same level!"
But Yoshiki, bravely struggling with it, had always been alone.
And now, when the group once again was left with drummer and vocalist only, he could not but reproach himself.
Three years had passed since graduating from high school, Yoshiki became 21 years old. And all these years completely, without distractions, he devoted to X.
Not fearing the unknown, without a long training burst into the world of rock music, Yoshiki did not enroll in a music college and gave up a career of pianist. But he did not regret this. But when the group was left by those two men, whom he believed to be the real group members, then an emptiness appeared somewhere inside his chest. And he could only see himself, bent from a blow. Yoshiki, absently gazing into space, saw only a fixed figure of a drummer of X.
Rock music that emerged in the second half of the 20th century carried the tremendous energy that could sweep away all obstacles. For Yoshiki, who from a young age accepted rock as a way to express himself, to continue the group's activities meant to continue believing in himself.
His pure enthusiasm, that led him to live-houses, opened many doors. However, moving forward on this path, and in the world of rock music, which became the symbol of the struggle for freedom, he was confronted with the existence of limitations and generally accepted opinion.
And the energy spent on destruction, now urged him to strive for excellence.
"Music of X is neither hard rock nor heavy metal."
"The group, which is involved in television broadcasts, cannot perform hard rock."
The more Yoshiki heard such statements, the more his heart felt desire for musical excellence. He locked himself in a studio rented for the night at 500 yen per hour, and continued drumming till the morning.
And while recording, Yoshiki also strove for perfection. Many musicians could not sustain his insistence and persistence as he pointed to errors in playing and endlessly repeated takes, and left the group.
And the true face of Yoshiki, in which without any balance coexisted destruction and creation, perfection and incompleteness, silence and noise, life and death, rest and motion, and all that in a single moment transformed into one another, this true face of his was known by Toshimitsu only .
Yoshiki started to lose self-confidence as a leader of the group after leaving of Jun and Hikaru. Trying hard for X, but without reaching the results he saw himself flying high in the sky, and having lost direction. Overflowing with ideas, the soul of Yoshiki was plunged into darkness. With pale face, he voiced aloud troubled thoughts which beset him. And the only person, who listened to him, was Toshimitsu.
"If it goes on like this, perhaps we will never find new band members. I'm sick of it all. Maybe it's better to quit?"
Staring at upset Yoshiki his friend Toshimitsu remained totally the same .It was the same Toshi, who three years ago, sitting in Yoshiki's room, ate with appetite peanut chocolate.
"Is it so far we have not achieved anything? Everything will be fine, Yoshiki. Everything will get better. And we will continue to strive together. "
While listening to the voice of Toshimitsu, Yoshiki had many thoughts intertwined in his mind. Splitting the morality, wanting to destroy the existing mindset, demonstrating it with all his actions, Yoshiki moved forward under the influence of the force of denial. In other words, if there were no obstacles in front of him, would he be able to reach the goal.
Only completely destroying all the obstacles in his way ...
Yoshiki looked into the face of Toshimitsu, and his anxiety disappeared, like burst soap bubble.
"Yes, Toshi, for the nth time we are going to search for the new band members."
Yoshiki often had a premonition that tomorrow's life could come to an end. That's why he wanted to live now, at every moment to the fullest. Therefore, new targets immediately imprinted in his pulsating heart and called him forward.
In the second half of 1986 Yoshiki started to look for a guitarist and a bassist. He decided once again to find common points with Taiji, who left the band about a year ago because of musical differences, and called him up again. Since then Taiji had not joined another group.
"Let's try and play in X again? We need a bass player. "
Taiji silently listened to the offer of Yoshiki. The last knew that Taiji was not so easy to change his fundamental beliefs, and there were still conflicts and contradictions between them, but at the same time believed that they would be able to move together toward one purpose.
Finally, agreeing with the bassist, it was necessary to look for a guitarist. Yoshiki found a guitarist by the name of Isao, who was known for his excellent playing technique. Visiting Isao, who lived in Kokubunji, he secured his consent to join X.
Yoshiki, surprised that he managed to gather such strong musicians, hoped that now X would be able to truly express themselves in music.
"I want two guitars in X" -
Yoshiki said, and everyone agreed with him.
Yoshiki remembered all the friends and acquaintances who could become a candidate for guitarists. While there were a lot of good musicians, but only one embodied his ideal. Yoshiki had not yet met guitarist better than Hideto Matsumoto, the group leader of SAVER TIGER.
"Hide-chan was born to be a guitarist of X. It's so obvious! "- Said Yoshiki to his friend Toshimitsu. "Someday, X will be better than SAVER TIGER, and I will lure him anyway - he declared more than once.
Yoshiki learned about the existence of Hideto at the time, when X had just started their performances in live-houses. He was at a recital of SAVER TIGER, which was held at the club EXPLOSION, and was appalled by their energy and flair. It seemed that the force of Hideto made the running in a band. They did not adhere to certain frames, being fashionable and at the same time wild. Their performances, and especially Hideto's guitar play, were reminiscent of BLACK SABBATH of Ozzy Osbourne era, and made a huge impression on viewers.
This band was really popular and had many fans, so that the rumors about their real debut to take place soon, were not unfounded.
Hideto, in turn, had heard about Yoshiki, about whom, in the company of common friends, there were more talks than about anyone else, as well.
First time Hideto saw Yoshiki during the concert of X in live-house in Yokohama, and at the first glance Yoshiki sunk into his soul.
For Hideto, who was born in Yokosuka, Yokohama and Shonan areas had a special significance. Scarcely had he entered the hall, he felt tension.
After watching the concert, during which guitar were broken, drums were smashed, fireworks were exploded, Hideto, being a little nervous, went to the dressing room. He could not find Yoshiki among covered with a thick layer of makeup fair haired musicians. Soon after, he jumped out of the closet and appeared in front of Hideto:
"Welcome, I am Yoshiki."
It seemed that this charming man was not the one who cried harsh words to the audience during the concert.
When Hideto saw Yoshiki, who resembled a foreign child somehow, his tension disappeared completely. He quietly began the conversation:
"Wow, everything is completely smashed, as if the huge Obaku rushed around the stage, so interesting."
"Yes, yes, it turned out well" - answered pleased Yoshiki and invited Hideto to the party, which as always was held after the concert.
"If you can, come and visit, there will also be fun."
Hideto gladly accepted his invitation.
In a crowded restaurant, on seeing Hideto, Yoshiki pushed away people and prepared a place for him.
"I've heard that X gave the best parties, but the reality exceeded expectations."
These words pleased Yoshiki very much.
"Well, today it is even modest, usually more people are attending.".
Amidst the din of laughter and hubbub Yoshiki and nbthe guitarist, who was just one year older, sat side by side and slowly lead the conversation. At this moment, both realized how identical their thoughts and feelings were.
Later Yoshiki often met with Hideto in other places, not associated with live-houses. People around were very surprised to see driving a warm conversation the leader of the popular group SAVER TIGER and the leader of the group X, which at any moment could be disbanded due to the lack of musicians. There were also a lot of well-wishers who advised Hideto "to stay away from this Yoshiki" and not to perform with him on one stage. Hideto wondered at the number of detractors of X, but their friendship with Yoshiki was becoming stronger every day.
SAVER TIGER once gave a concert in Yokohama in Live-house called Yokohama 7th AVENUE. Yoshiki heard about it, and rushed by car from Tokyo to Yokohama. As he watched the concert, the decision finally got stronger in him.
"Today, I will invite him for sure."
Yoshiki could not afford to Hideto, shining on the stage, not become yet another member of X.
Drinking a lot at an after - party, Yoshiki, in spite of the musicians from the band sat next to him, said:
"Hide, come and join X!"
Sitting next to Yoshiki friend reached out and stopped his mouth.
"Yoshiki-san! It is impossible in such a place! If you going to lure the leader in the face of the band, it can cause a big scandal! "
"It does not matter. Today I want to tell him directly! "
But most of all was surprised Hideto himself. He grabbed Yoshiki's hand and led him into a corner of the cafe.
"Please do not say it in such a place, Yoshiki. Let's talk here. "
Other band members heard Yoshiki and there were angry voices. But there were plenty of sake, which usually served for the beginning of strife, but this time helped to avoid a scandal. Yoshiki and the members of the group SAVER TIGER, being heavily drunk already , did not fight, but peacefully, laughing, continued to party until the morning.
Continued to drink Yoshiki turned to Hideto and said gravely:
"Hide, you and me in the future will be together for sure!"
Yoshiki knew that many groups would be happy to see Hideto in their ranks, but he believed Hideto sure to become one of X.
Hideto listened to the self-confident words of Yoshiki and only smiled silently.
But in reality, SAVER TIGER also had major problems with the members. Despite its popularity, due to contradictions between the musicians in the second half of 1986 the band was forced to stop its activity.
When it was decided to disband the group to which Hideto put all his soul, he telephoned Yoshiki.
"I'm leaving the group."
"What happened?"
Hideto replied curtly:
"We decided to disband SAVER TIGER. Members just stopped to understand each other, and we could not continue together. "
His voice sounded extremely upset.
"I have a license of cosmetologist. I'll return home in Yokosuka, and will become a beautician. Guitar will have to be forgotten. "
"Really? Can you change the decision? "
"I've already decided."
Yoshiki, who still persistently called Hideto to his group, heard his firm decision, uttered in a stifled voice, and decided to take it. He deeply respected the feelings of Hideto and did not call him to the group again.
"Well, perhaps it would be better."
The conversation ended.
However, deep in heart Hideto was not at rest. After two or three days, he had not start a new life, and called Yoshiki again.
"Yoshiki, what are you doing now?"
"We have a rehearsal in studio in Ikebukuro, now."
Hearing this, Hideto immediately asked:
"Wow! Can I come and watch? "
"Of course you can!"
After some time arrived Hideto was met by Yoshiki, Toshimitsu, Taiji and Isao. Hideto settled on the floor of the studio and carefully watched a rehearsal of the four musicians. Starting at eight o'clock in the evening, a rehearsal was over about two o'clock in the morning. Yoshiki turned to Hideto:
"We're going to drink, Hide, would you like to join?"
"Yes."
Yoshiki understood that his friend was having a hard time after the disbandment of his group. Imagining all the bitterness of such feelings, he could find no words of sympathy and consolation.
And suddenly in the middle of frivolous conversation Hideto quietly, so that only Yoshiki heard him, said:
"Do you still need a guitarist in X?"
"Yes."
After Yoshiki's answer Hideto again fell silent.
In the bar Yoshiki, understanding feelings of Hideto, started a non-significant conversation. Suddenly, Hideto said:
"I join."
"What?"
Although Yoshiki perfectly understood the meaning of the words, he could not help but ask again once more.
"Are you serious?"
Bad reputation of Yoshiki and his group didn't matter for Hideto. He knew that he could be in a band only with Yoshiki, who could understand his pain after losing SAVER TIGER.
"Yes, I join X."
Yoshiki, unable to cope with the overflowing emotions, jumped up and gave a wild cry of joy. The remaining band members were also very happy. After all, the one who was considered the best guitarist now linked his name to X.
Yoshiki now felt as he was able to remove mountains. And maybe now they could change the world of rock music. Yoshiki was 21 years old, and he felt an unprecedented strength in every breath, every heartbeat.
In late 1986, shortly after joining of Hideto, another incident happened. Guitarist Isao got into a motorcycle accident, taken to the hospital, and after that was forced to leave the group.
" X should have two guitars" - said Hideto, and Yoshiki nodded in acknowledgment:
"Yes, we must urgently seek for the second guitarist."
And Yoshiki promised Hideto to find the second guitarist for sure.
On January 2, 1987 Yoshiki called one friend guitarist. It was Ishizuka, who occasionally appeared in X as a support guitarist. Shortly before, Yoshiki, Toshimitsu and Taiji, three of them, were recording for the album «SKULL TRASH ZONE VOLUME I" and the guitar part was given to Ishizuka. «Stab Me In The Back" and «No Connection" were recorded, and after that Ishizuka returned to work in a video rental store. He still had not been engaged in a permanent group.
"Pata, this is Yoshiki. What are you doing now? "
"Just the same, do my work at a video store."
Yoshiki briefed him about joining of Hideto and remembering the play of Ishizuka made a final decision.
"Pata, come and join X. No one other than you will be able to play along with Hide. "
Pata, as usual, wasted no time for a long thinking.
"OK."
Yoshiki was thrilled that finally he managed to gather a group of full membership.
And though they met every day at rehearsals in the evenings they do not want to part, and they drank together until the next morning. Every time they came together in the canteen, located near the rented studio, Yoshiki was whispering softly:
"Now I have another family."
Yoshiki was seized by a premonition that soon important events would begin. And although at first glance no significant changes were noticed, but it seemed something was brewing in the air. Like the precision instrument, Yoshiki, with his susceptibility had already knew, that creation of X would be the first sign of new Japanese rock music.
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